Jan 12, 2010 1:15 PM
Obviously if the first date doesn't go well, there's little chance a second one will ever happen. First dates often come pre-packaged with enough stress to give a gal the vapors. But it's still just a date. It's not a fight to the death for the perseverance of the human race. We're here to offer all you daring singles some first-date tips you might find helpful. These are observations hard earned over years in the dating trenches, but we're no professionals - just women who have been there trying to help a sister out. As always, comments and extra tips are welcome and encouraged!
1. Dress comfortably: Women often squeeze themselves into dresses or paint on jeans hoping to look alluring and sexy and then spend the evening barely breathing or worrying that something inappropriate will pop out. Highlight your best feature. For example - if you have slamming legs - wear a skirt that shows them off, but pair it with a simple top.
2. Order actual food: When you order a garden salad with no dressing your date will not think "Oh,she likes to take care of her body." He'll think "Great, a rabbit." Order what you would eat if you were out with your girlfriends (ok - maybe not garlic hot wings). Being super self-conscious is a date-terminator.
3. Listen. Ask. Share: So often you get preoccupied with your clothes (if you didn't adhere to No. 1) or if your date is into you, or just anxious in general - "OMGhessocutemyhairstoobigburritofrlunchbadideaOMG" and so on. Relax. Chat. Ask questions about how he got into rock climbing or tell that story about the one and only time you went camping.
4. Wear sexy underwear: No, this is not a just-in-case-it-goes-there contingency plan. When you're wearing the goods underneath whatever cute little number you put together it's like a wee secret just for you. It gives you an extra little boost of confidence; and if the date doesn't go so well you'll catch a peek of your La Perla while changing into your PJ's and remember that you're a bombshell.
5. Leave a little bit to the imagination: If the date comes to a conclusion on someone's couch, enjoy all the middle-school level make-out time you want. But a little mystery is a good thing. Trust us - if the date made it to couch-territory, you'll have another opportunity to graduate to high school, or even college-level hanky panky.
6. Talk about your exes: Nothing is more unattractive and uninteresting to your date than your eses. Except perhaps the intricate details of your menstrual cycle, but that's a big maybe. No ex-chat on the first date.
7. Get "lazy eye" drunk: We're adults. Dates often involve adult beverages. But be careful not to indulge too much. There's a pretty definitive line between a wee bit tipsy and 5 appletinis. Crazy drunk is neither pretty nor interesting. Please see Girls Gone Wild.
8. Sell yourself short: They're not all winners, ladies. You're grade A, undiluted fabulousness and therefore deserve nothing but the best. You should have a zero tolerance policy on bullshit. If you get a creep vibe from someone there's a good chance they're probably a creep, even if they are cute and they ask you out again.
9. "He said his favorite color is blue and I have blue eyes so I think that means he likes me.": We've all been the center of/participated in pre-game pow-wows, date night fashion shows, and post-game analytical break-downs. And while those are an inherently wonderful part of being a woman, over thinking can sometimes over complicate things.
10. Despair: There are a lot of wackjob, weirdos, losers, and assholes out there. And we've dated at least one from every category. But don't brick yourself into a bitter barn because of a run of crummy dates - there are just as many worthy and wonderful individuals as there are baddies. Some of those old adages are true - you do have to kiss a lot of frogs... and lizards... and komodo dragons... and the occasional cockroach to find the prince, but you will. And in case you're wondering... he's looking for you too.