I'd Rather Be: Horatio Caine

While a Personal Shopper can give you what you need for real life, I'd Rather Be sets you up for fantasy lives you didn't even know you had. Because sometimes a new shampoo isn't enough for a whole new you. (Want us to outfit your alter ego or your alternate reality? Just say the word!)

You may be a daytime...well, we have no idea, but you are a nighttime crimefighter. With Horatio Caine as your guide, you can take down any non-law-abiding citizen with your orange tan, bad jokes, and inimitable acting skills. They can call you the fashion...POLICE.

  • When you are as amazing and awesome as Horatio Caine, steps have to be taken to ensure everyone knows it. That's why you start your day by pulling back your inspirational bedding ($229)...
  • and slathering on some self-tanner ($45), because let's face it: redheads don't tan naturally.
  • To brush up on some awesome one-liners and maintain your comedic gold card, you ditch the morning paper for some Mad Libs ($5) that focus your criminological mind...
  • as you lounge by the pool, where you also take the time to refine your alligator wrestling skills ($20), in case you find yourself in the Everglades sometime soon to dig up yet another pile of evidence.
  • After rinsing off and reapplying the required self-tanner, you suit up ($33) with your sleeves rolled up, Miami style.
  • Before you get behind the wheel of your car, you slide on your mirrored aviators ($69) just so you can take them back off again, whenever you feel a quality pun coming on.
  • Once you get to your desk, you take a moment to groom your palm tree bonsai ($37) and channel some of Florida's energy into your emotionally vague life.
  • You take out your phone, snap on the case ($41) to let everyone know you mean business, and wait for the greatest song ($9) on the planet to ring out. (Yes, you have "Won't Get Fooled Again" as your ringtone. You know which part.)
  • You do all this to remind everyone how good you are at what you do and that not everybody can handle...the hurriCaine.

    Post A Comment



    If you've got a product or service that you'd like to promote on Outblush, click here to find out about our advertising opportunities.

    Scroll down for more kickin' selections, and let us know what you think with our NEW Comments feature!