Dear Anne Hathaway: You were so cute last night, except for your constantly yelling "Woooo!" every time someone came onstage. We wanted every single dress you wore.
Dear James Franco: Were you high? Seriously, that "Duuuude, where's my car?" schtick got old quick. We know you can act, and you think everything is so below you, but seriously, it's an honor to host the Oscars and you blew it, IOHO.
Dear actresses pictured above: Thank you for not going the dishwater beige dress route that's become so popular of late! We were ecstatic to see tons of crimsons, blues, purples and other vibrant hues adorning your fabulous selves. That's why we're gonna not-so-tactfully ignore all those blah dresses and focus on a much-needed rainbow of color to brighten up this late winter day.
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