May 16, 2012 8:45 AM
You're minding your own business, sipping a cold-brewed green tea in the local bookstore, when out pops the most handsome man your small town has ever seen. With emerald-green eyes. He asks about your book selection, revealing that he's just picked up the same. Nine Stories by J.D. Salinger. He seems familiar with the text, instantly quoting "The Laughing Man". He picks up on your flirtatious laugh, shyly taking out a pen and notepad, preparing to ask a question. Your interest is piqued, your heart starts to race, and your palms begin to sweat. He opens his mouth just as you feel your armpits swell with moisture, ready to ruin the moment as always. As soon as you hear the words "...get a bite to eat tonight?", you remember that you actually put on some CLEAN Original Moisture-Absorbent Deodorant ($18) that morning and gladly accept his offer for dinner in his personal library that evening.
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