Think your writing is crap? Then you might as well be dumping it onto the pages of these Poo Paper Journals ($21), made from repurposed elephant and panda excrement.
It's not the gift, but the thought that counts...and your thought sucks! Outblush presents Your Gift Isn't Good Enough, a list of the most common gift-giving faux pas so you can avoid being the one Secret Santa everyone fears.
Nothing says "I don't know what the f*ck to get you!" quite like a gift card. One step above handing someone a wad of cash with a ribbon around it, the gift card is often misconstrued as an indifferent gift, but that's not the case - they're actually preferred for pragmatists and control freaks. But the devil is in the details. For example, a $20 gift card may be generous, but it won't do any good at Neiman Marcus.
You also want to make sure your recipient will go to the store: don't assume someone who loves coffee also likes Starbucks. If you don't know your
Looking for a way to
shut the kids up entertain the children you love so dearly? These 36"x59" Supersized Colouring Pictures ($11) are big enough to keep all the kids busy and the house quiet for one glass - maybe even one-and-a-half glasses - of wine.
Everything is better when it's shiny, from wood floors to jewelry to your currently salt-encrusted car. Wall colors are no exception. This Devine Color Gold Dust ($10) can be dumped into a paint can of your choice to lend any hue an extra dash of gleaming sparkle. (And splurge for that heated car wash. Your muffler will thank you.)
We haven't had a pair of boots this color or this comfortable since the '90s, when we were rocking Timberlands. Cole Haan's Cassidy Bootie ($278) in camello nubuck is our new go-to boot. Now, we can go ahead and throw away that pair of Tims we've been hiding in the back of the closet.
If you've got a product or service that you'd like to promote on Outblush, click here to find out about our advertising opportunities.
We here at Outblush don't condone smoking, but we very much condone wit and humor. By highlighting the similarities of cigarette smoke and smog, the Ashtray Factory ($17) may even make you want to quit! (...or take a drag from a smokestack...)
Going hunting? Even if you're not, it's a good time of year to wear orange when you're enjoying the great outdoors. If you're not sure how well Day-Glo compliments your complexion, stay warm and avoid being mistaken for a buck with this less glaring orange vest ($60).
Bread: the best part of the Thanksgiving Day meal. Well, aside from the pecan pie topped with whipped cream. Oh, and the turkey smothered in gravy...and the sweet potatoes with melted mini marshmallows. Okay, bread: one of the best parts of the Thanksgiving Day meal. Keep yours warm by sticking the starchy goodness into the Avva Felt Breadbasket ($62) until you're ready to gobble it down with gobs of butter.
Oooh, fancy. The Blue Velvet Short Sleeveless Dress ($129) from WhiteLily Fashion will have you looking fabulous for all the fun winter events you've got planned. You're not going to take this one for a spin while you're sledding, of course, but the crystal collar and quilted velvet will lend themselves nicely to champagne at midnight!
There's something calming about watching Tetris pieces fall... well suited for your morning coffee. Experienced Tetris fans will love the final scene on the Tetris Heat Change Mug ($9), the thrilling anticipation of that long piece hanging above the crevice.
Imagine chocolate was good for you. And we mean seriously good - good enough that you could stuff it into your face without worrying a bit about your waistline. Well, sometimes dreams really do come true. Askinosie Roasted Cocoa Nibs ($11) have all the flavor without the less than salubrious additives. There's no fat, no sugar - just pure Tanzanian cocoa goodness. Go ahead. Eat the whole can.
If anyone gives you funny looks when you take out the trash, just tell them you had a really good day at the fair.
Goldfish Garbage Bags ($12)
We like our peanut butter the way we like our heroes in spy movies - mixed in with something bigger. Offering premium natural peanut butter blended with wild honey and additional delicious ingredients, the PB Crave Variety Pack ($18) includes three different flavors: Cookie Nookie (cookie dough, chocolate), Razzle Dazzle (raspberry, white and dark chocolate), and CoCo Banana (bananas, chocolate).
Forget partridges in pear trees, you're more familiar with microbes in a petri dish. The 12 days of geeky christmas cards ($4-18, depending on amount ordered) are right up your alley. Grab a set, sign your name, and then slip them into the lab coat pockets of your co-workers. (This is a safe way to avoid making any awkward chit-chat that doesn't revolve around cell fusion or atom splitting.)
With Thanksgiving on the way, it's necessary that we find clothing options that allow for significant, hidden bloating. Free People's Swinging 60's Dress ($118) camouflages our temporarily big bellies, while showing off the the parts of us that don't blimp up at the sight of turkey: our legs.